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TRANSCRIPT | EPISODE 5

[Transcripts are generated by a combination of speech recognition and transcribers, and may contain errors.]


00:00:04


NARRATOR


In October of 2011, 4 college students disappeared in the woods near Porter Township Pennsylvania while researching a documentary on children’s author Jakob Stanley. They remain missing to this day. Last month their recordings appeared online.



00:00:20


NARRATOR


In an effort to aid in the investigation, the families of those missing have agreed to release the following sound files. If anyone has information on those missing or the identity of the person or persons who uploaded these files, please use the contact information provided. Anything submitted may be used in future episodes. Certain materials referenced in this podcast, including the published works of Jakob Stanley, are currently protected under U.S. copyright law and may be redacted. For legal reasons, some names have been withheld and voices altered. The views and opinions expressed in this podcast are solely those of the podcasters and participants, and do not represent the official policy or position of the Iphigenia County Police Department of Porter Township Pennsylvania or its associates. This podcast contains adult themes and language. Listener discretion is advised.



00:01:13


PROFESSOR WHITAKER


Warning. This episode discusses suicide. For support and resources please contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline or your local crisis center. ... File labeled: “005 Rough Cut, Episode 5 - Tell Me a Story: The True Life of Jakob Stanley.”



SFX: Avery turns on the mic and plays with the settings.



00:01:38


AVERY


Testing this out, can I hear myself. Can you hear me? Check, check. Test, test.



SFX: Avery is climbing a treacherous stairwell at the Mendenhall Institute. It sounds like a crypt.



AVERY NARRATOR


Okay, so today we are going to do something a little different... Chuck and Tolen are with Wallace and the search party looking for Jane, and since RJ and I are without transportation, we have decided to do some background on the Mendenhall Institute as we now know Stanley owned the land its on,... and coincidently within walking distance - shit ... Ah, and because RJ can talk her way into anywhere, we’re actually inside the belly of the beast itself. So, we’re also gonna shoot a quick episode of RJ’s ghost hunting show BOO. Ah, and we will hopefully not die in the process. Whooo! Alright, let’s get haunted.



00:02:44


[PODCAST INTRO SEQUENCE]


NEWS ANNOUNCER


WN [BEEP REDACTED] TV New York.



MUSIC: [80’s NEWS INTRO THEME]



NEWS ANCHOR ‘83


If your child has been to a school book fair recently, chances are they came home with one of this author’s scary books-



MUSIC: [80’s SUNDAY TALK SHOW THEME]



SUNDAY MORNING TALK SHOW HOST ‘81


Our guest’s first anthology leapt to the top of the New York Times Best Sellers list -



MUSIC: [LATE NIGHT TALK SHOW INTRO APPLAUSE]



LATE NIGHT TALK SHOW HOST ‘86


- Thank you. Thank you! Over the past few years, he has become a household name -



MUSIC: [PODCAST THEME]



PUBLIC RADIO HOST ‘92


- Bridging the gap between Alvin Schwartz and Stephen King -



TV PREACHER


- The devil is among us, friends.



CONGREGATION


AMEN!



TV PREACHER


He’s among us, in the form of a writer. -



SUNDAY MORNING TALK SHOW HOST ‘81


- The book might have struggled during it initial release in 1977, but now “Tell Me A Story: Under the Bed That’s Over My Head”, has skyrocketed -



ALSC COMMITTEE REP


- So many parent organizations complained that his work was too sophisticated for children-



TV PREACHER


- He has infiltrated your homes, and your children’s minds-



PUBLIC RADIO HOST ‘92


- His second macabre anthology “Tell Me A Story: Moonless Sky and Other Friends” sold out from bookstores in mere minutes. Becoming a controversial -



NEWS ANCHOR ‘83


- Stanley's books ranked on the American Library Association’s “100 Most Frequently Challenged Books” from 1981-1993 -



TV PREACHER


- Stanley’s books promote disobedience, violence and the occult! Lord have mercy -



PUBLIC RADIO HOST ‘92


- The 3rd volume in his “Tell Me A Story” collection “The Floor That Creaks, the Closet That Speaks and the Tip Toes That You Walk On” was released in 1986 to mass acclaim -



ALSC COMMITTEE REP


- All that fussing, just made his work more popular -



TV PREACHER


- Check your children’s rooms, check their bookshelves, check their back-packs! -



YOUTUBER


- I do think his final book, released in ‘99, “TMAS: The nightmare, The Dream and the Places Between,” was by far his best work.-



PUBLIC RADIO HOST ‘92


- His work has been described as “subversive” and “dark,” I simply describe it as genius.



SUNDAY MORNING TALK SHOW HOST ‘81


- It is my pleasure to introduce -



LATE NIGHT TALK SHOW HOST ‘86


- Please welcome -



PUBLIC RADIO HOST ‘92


- Ladies and gentleman, please welcome -



SUNDAY MORNING TALK SHOW HOST ‘81


- Jakob Stanley.-



LATE NIGHT TALK SHOW HOST ‘86


- Mister Jakob Stanley.



PUBLIC RADIO HOST ‘92


- Author, Jakob Stanley.



[Applause.]



MUSIC: [POD THEME SYNTH]



00:04:25


AVERY/NARRATOR


Little to nothing is known about the life of this elusive author. And since 1999 Jakob Stanley seems to have completely dropped off the face of the earth. Until a short two-line obituary appeared in a small town paper, over a year ago.



TOLEN/NARRATOR


From BOO Labs and Red Cup Media, I'm Tolen Reid -



AVERY/NARRATOR


And I'm Avery Fischer, this is TELL ME A STORY: THE TRUE LIFE OF JAKOB STANLEY.



SFX: The loud ticking of a massive grandfather clock welcomes us back to the Homestead. The room feels empty and still except for a few pops coming from a fire in the fireplace.



00:04:57


AVERY/NARRATOR (CONT’D)


Loretta Moyer is the all powerful, matriarch of the Porter Township Moyer clan. She is well versed in the history and folklore of this town, especially the Mendenhall Institute.



RJ


(off mic)


You can go ahead.



LORETTA


What am I saying here now?



RJ


(off mic)


Introduce yourself... what you’re gonna talk about-



AVERY


(off mic)


And the verbal consent.



LORETTA


Hello. My name is Loretta Leigh Moyer and my family has run the Homestead in Porter Township, PA for generations. And today I am going to be talking about the Mendenhall Institute and the story of Patient #349.



AVERY


(off mic)


And the verbal consent.



LORETTA


Oh. And I approve this message.



[The 3 start to crack up.]



LORETTA (CONT’D)


That wasn’t it.



AVERY


(off mic)


And I consent-



LORETTA


No, I got it...


And I consent...



[They giggle again.]



AVERY


(off mic)


We have a release you can sign.



LORETTA


Ha, good, cuz that’s the best you’re gonna get.



[They laugh.]



00:06:12


RJ/NARRATOR


Upon first glance, Miss Loretta seems like a stereotypical gran, but if you talk to her for more than 5 minutes... you realize that she’s anything but. Miss Loretta is completely fascinated by all things macabre. And 100% believes in ghosts. Like, there is not a doubt in her mind. Also, she has great weed.



AVERY/NARRATOR


In our previous episode, Miss Loretta told us about the Mendenhall Institute’s hidden underground tunnel system that connected to a massive crematorium used to burn the bodies of their patients.



SFX: Low Beep and click.



AVERY


Note: Insert more on the religious sect “The Order of the Light,” or “The Light of His Word” or “The Light.” Note over.



SFX: Low Beep and click.



RJ/NARRATOR


Miss Loretta is gonna provide a bit more detail on the stories of abuse within the Institute and the local ghost story of Patent #349.


SFX: The fireplace pops in the background.



00:07:11


LORETTA


Such a terrible thing, people dumping their family members there. Just disgusting.



RJ


(off mic)


That place seems absolutely terrifying.



LORETTA


It was. And it still is... In all the years it was open, thousands and thousands of people died in their care.



AVERY


(off mic)


Yikes.



LORETTA


Can you imagine the weight of all that? All those souls just piling up, and piling up, and piling up. I think that psychic weight is what made the dam burst.



RJ


(off mic)


How do you mean “the dam burst”?



LORETTA


When patients started escaping. That place was up and running for over 60 years, and for over 60 years no one gave it a second thought. They were doing “God’s work” there. You wouldn’t have even imagined anyone would’ve ever wanted to escape. They were safe there. They were cared for. They had everything they needed. Hell, it even looked like a damn palace.



AVERY


(off mic)


But patients began escaping?



LORETTA


Ya...starting in like ‘62, ’63. Few times a year, 4 or 5 of uhm would break out. Now, that might not sound like a lot, but remember no patients had ever run away from there before.



RJ


(off mic)


And where would they go?



00:08:28


LORETTA


Some got lost in the woods trying to climb the ridge. Most got funneled into town where they’d get scooped up and taken back. It wasn’t even until ‘77, ‘79 before people finally started paying attention and actually listening to those poor creatures. I only ever heard bits and bobs... But it’s all so horrible. Strapping patients to wheel chairs, so they couldn’t run... removing their teeth, so they couldn’t bite... binding their hands, so they couldn’t fend for themselves... feeding them with tubes down their throats.



RJ


(off mic)


Shit.



LORETTA


Not even allowed the dignity of eating their own food.



AVERY


(off mic)


Damn.



LORETTA


They had to know, those rich folks. They had to know they were sending their family members off to die... and they just didn’t care.



RJ


(off mic)


Miss Loretta, should we take a little break?



LORETTA


No, no, no girls, I’m fine. I am.



AVERY


(off mic)


Uh, well why don’t we change gears for a bit? Yeah? How about you tell us the story of patient #349?



RJ


(off mic)


I might’ve actually heard this one before?



00:09:50


LORETTA


“Don’t go out to the wood dear friends, the wind doth howl and the branch doth creak, summoning the lady far up at Great Peak. And if you hear the ring of her bell, she will drag you straight to hell.”



AVERY


(off mic)


That’s similar to “Lady Bell” from Stanley’s first book?



RJ


(off mic)


Right.



LORETTA


I don’t know it from any book, that’s just something the kids round here used to say... on nights like tonight... when the wind whips through the woods... It was 1962, a beautiful, raven haired young woman, broke free from the asylum and ran for miles through the woods, barefoot in the snow. Her feet slashed by the underbrush, cut a red path through the fields of white. Once she reached the highest ridge on Great Cliff’s Peak, she set her sites on a gnarled oak. And there, she strung herself up from the highest branch... and hanged herself.



SFX: The wind picks up outside.



LORETTA (CONT’D)


Because of the way the wind shot up the side of Great Cliff’s Peak, it made her nightgown billow out wide. And through the night it froze hard... outstretched... collecting the falling snow. Police who were first on scene said she looked like a great white bell, ... with her bloody feet swinging back and forth in the wind... up high in the oak, looking down at the Mendenhall. That oak has been known as the Bell Tree ever since.



RJ


(off mic)


Oh man.



00:11:34


LORETTA


And on cold nights, when the wind is strong and cuts through the hollow like a blade, you can hear the faint sound of a ringing bell... echoing for miles through the valley.



SFX: A faint sound of a bell rings in the distance.



RJ


(off mic)


Full. Bod. Chills. ... I have a million more questions.



AVERY


(off mic)


Oh my God yes. What happened when the Mendenhall closed?



RJ


(off mic)


You said they didn’t find anyone? Not even staff?



AVERY


(off mic)


What else do you know about The Light?



RJ


(off mic)


Shit yeah, what’s the deal with The Light?



DEBBIE


(from upstairs)


Ma, you still up?



LORETTA


Oh, balls.



DEBBIE


(from upstairs)


Come on.



LORETTA


Best get yourselves upstairs!



SFX: Avery and RJ begin collecting their sound equipment in a hurry as Deb approaches.



DEBBIE


(from upstairs)


Bedtime for Bonzo.



AVERY


(whispering)


Thank you, Miss Loretta!



RJ


(whispering)


Thank you, Miss Loretta!



AVERY


(whispering)


Goodnight!



LORETTA


(whispering)


Goodnight girls-



RJ


That was awesome!



SFX: The mic cuts off.



MUSIC: [TRANSITION]



AVERY/NARRATOR


And now for something completely different. Here is an excerpt from our shoot at the Mendenhall for RJ’s show BOO.



SFX: “BOO” Intro Sting



SFX: Avery and RJ are standing outside in front of the main building of the Mendenhall.



00:12:33


RJ


It is literally the most terrifying building I have ever seen.



AVERY


Uh, yup.



SFX: “BOO” Intro Sting



RJ


It there anyone here?



SFX: There is a beat of silence, we only hear the creepy basement and echos of their breath.



MUSIC: [BOO THEME]



RJ/NARRATOR


We are all comprised of matter and energy.



CHUCK


What was that?!



RJ


I didn’t hear anything?



SFX: A crashing sound comes from the corner of the basement.



CHUCK


Well, did you freaken’ hear that?!



RJ/NARRATOR


So, if the Law of Conservation of Energy - the basic tenet of thermodynamics - is true, what happens to our energy after we die...



RJ


ORBS!



CHUCK


Oh, hell no.



RJ/NARRATOR


If it cannot simply... disappear?



RJ


Did you see that?



RJ/NARRATOR


We want to know.



CHUCK


Ahhh, nononononono!!!



RJ/NARRATOR


This is Charles Young and I am RJ Álvarez and this is “BOO... Beyond Our Observation.”



CHUCK


Nononononono! AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!



RJ


Chuck come back.



SFX: “BOO” Sting.



SFX: They set up for their interview with the caretaker of the Mendenhall. The Mendenhall is cavernous and echoey.



RJ (CONT’D)


(off mic)


We set?



AVERY


(off mic)


Good to go.



RJ


(off mic)


Avery!



AVERY


(off mic)


What! I have tiny hands, they get cold.



RJ


(off mic)


Those are Chuck’s!



AVERY


(off mic)


She’s not using them.



[The caretaker [BEEP/name redacted] approaches and clears his throat.]



CARETAKER


(off mic)


Y’all ready for me.



RJ


(off mic)


Yes of course.



SFX: BOO Transition Sting.



00:14:13


RJ (CONT’D)


Well, we are now meeting [BEEP] the caretaker here at the Mendenhall Institute. How are you [BEEP]?



CARETAKER


Good, good.



RJ


Let’s talk the history of this building, when was it built?



CARETAKER


Construction started in 1897 and opened in 1901.



RJ


And it was run by a religious sect called, The Order of the Light, or The Light?



CARETAKER


I don’t think I know about that.



RJ


Okay, and it was open as a psychiatric hospital?



CARETAKER


Psychiatric institute.



RJ


Ah. Is there a big difference between the two?



CARETAKER


Ha. Probably not. Can’t say I know about that either.



RJ


How many patients lived here?



CARETAKER


At any one time, there could be 400-800? After WWI got up to over 2 thousand.



RJ


Wow.



CARETAKER


Yeah.



RJ


And it was an operating hospital until when?



CARETAKER


It stayed opened until 1981.



RJ


Really?



CARETAKER


Yes ma’am. But the patient count went way down at the end.



RJ


And, why did they close?



CARETAKER


The place just seemed to run its course.



AVERY


(off mic)


We interviewed Miss Loretta at the Homestead last night.



CARETAKER


Ah. So, how much do you know?



AVERY


(off mic)


Enough to know this place didn’t just run it’s course.



CARETAKER


Oh, so there you go. [laughs uncomfortably] Uh. The main office is this way.



SFX: He turns and starts walking down a long echoey hallway.



AVERY


(off mic)


Uh, okay.



SFX: BOO TRANSITION STING



SFX: RJ and the caretaker sit in the main office of the Mendenhall, Avery continues to film.



00:15:53


RJ


Have you experienced anything here?



CARETAKER


Not sure how to explain it. But sometimes you can get caught up in these feelings that don’t seem like yours.



RJ


How do you mean?



CARETAKER


Ah, it’s like you’re just going about your day and one second you’re fine, the next, you’re sad, or you’re angry, then suddenly you feel like laughing. Then as quick as it hits, it stops and you’re back to yourself.



RJ


So, a strong emotional energy... certain areas trigger overwhelmingly strong emotions?



CARETAKER


I suppose you could put it like that. Yeah.



RJ


Do you ever get the feeling that you are not alone here?



CARETAKER


Oh. Yeah. Yeah.



RJ


But, you often work here by yourself? Do you ever have any problem coming in here, being alone with all this... energy?



CARETAKER


No, no. It’s fine. I feel bad for uhm.



00:16:56


RJ


For who?



CARETAKER


Whoever’s here.



SFX: Suddenly, there is weird sound like burst of air. RJ and Avery are startled.



AVERY


(off mic)


Bah!



RJ


What was that?



CARETAKER


Ha, oh I was gonna warn ya. You see they had this pneumatic tube system in the walls here.



AVERY


(off-mic)


A what?



CARETAKER


A pneumatic tube system. It’s used to send messages and medicine through the Institute. It’s really old, so from time to time there are these bursts of air that can be a little startling. Don’t mind it.



SFX: Suddenly there is another weird sound like burst of air.



RJ


HA! Yeah, that is a bit startling.



CARETAKER


There are all these stories about how the staff would play tricks on one another, send random things through the system.



RJ


Like what?



CARETAKER


Uh, you know like sending water balloons... Uh, cake. Even dirty baby diapers. [laughs] Can you imagine requesting a sedative from the pharmacy, and getting a mess of doot instead. [giggle snort] ... But yeah, all that horse play really messed up the system.



AVERY


(off mic)


Wait. There were babies here?



CARETAKER


Oh yeah, full nursery wing on the top floor.



RJ


There was a nursery here?



CARETAKER


Yes.



RJ


I thought this facility was only for adults.



CARETAKER


It was. The nursery was mostly for the children of the patients who lived here.



RJ


Huh.



CARETAKER


Sometimes women would show up pregnant - other times, patients would get together here, and one thing would lead to another. People’s people.



AVERY


(off mic)


Right.



RJ


Can we shoot up there?



CARETAKER


Uh...



AVERY


(off mic)


Absolutely not.



RJ


Avery, that’s what we’re here for.



AVERY


(off mic)


Uhm, I’m not here for that. I didn’t sign up for baby ghosts.



RJ


You’re worse than Chuck.



AVERY


(off mic)


Feel free to go up there with all the ghost babies, I am not interested.



RJ


(off mic/under breath)


But, you agreed to-



AVERY


(off mic)


I agreed to the tunnels, that is my max on freaky.



CARETAKER


Ah, you girls don’t need to fuss about it. That area’s closed off. I can’t take you up there anyway.



RJ


Oh no, really?



CARETAKER


Yeah, floor’s not safe.



AVERY


(off mic)


Thank God.



SFX: BOO Transition Sting.



SFX: RJ and Gregor stand in the dining hall of the building, Avery continues to film. The dining hall is even more massive than the entrance, with high vaulted ceilings that makes every sound reverberate throughout your body.



00:18:37


RJ


We’re now in the massive dining hall of the Mendenhall Institute.



CARETAKER


Grand Dining Room.



RJ


Excuse me, Grand Dining Room.



CARETAKER


Over that way is the kitchen and in this area is where they had the rows of tables. The floors and walls are hand-cut marble, and all these archways are gold leaf.



RJ


And those windows!



CARETAKER


The stained glass windows were brought over from France. There are 37 along the east wall and 14 along the west. All the statues and pillars were imported from Europe.



RJ


Breathtaking.



AVERY


(off mic)


... What’s this emblem on the floor?



RJ


(reading)


“Similia similibus curentur”?



AVERY


(off mic)


What does that mean?



RJ


I’m not sure-



[Gregor clears his throat.]



CARETAKER


The owner hired a restoration team to try to bring the Mendenhall back to it’s former glory - well at least the best they could. Took almost 10 years.



AVERY


(off mic)


By owner you mean Jakob Stanley? Or sorry, Russell Stanley?



CARETAKER


Yeah, Russell... Ah, Mr. Stanley.



RJ


This would be a good time to introduce my lovely BOO Berries to Avery Fisher. Not only is she assisting me today, but she’s heading a docu-series on the writer Jakob Stanley. Avery, do you have any questions for [BEEP]?



AVERY


(off mic)


Really? Okay thanks.



SFX: RJ passes Avery a mic.



AVERY (CONT’D)


Uhm, did you ever know anything about the Stanleys? They evidently lived on the property?



CARETAKER


Oh, ... the old Stanley farm house.



RJ


(off mic)


Yeah.



CARETAKER


I’m not from here, but as far as what I know, the Stanley family were some of the first locals to work here... I think since it opened.



AVERY


They worked here?



CARETAKER


That’s how they came to live in that house.



RJ


(off mic)


No way.



AVERY


Do you know what they did here? For the Institute?



CARETAKER


I would guess maintenance? The Docs and nurses lived in the buildings on the main grounds.



00:20:31


RJ


(off mic)


So, why were they still in that house? If no one in the family worked here anymore?



CARETAKER


Can’t say for sure. Maybe the family had been living there so long at that point, the Mendenhall just let them stay.



AVERY


How altruistic of them. Uhm. So, then Jakob Stanley bought all the Mendenhall property, in its entirety?



CARETAKER


Right when the Mendenhall closed in ‘81.



AVERY


But, before that point, the Stanley family didn’t own any of the land, or the house?



CARETAKER


Got it all in one big chunk.



AVERY


Huh.



RJ


(off mic)


Okay.



AVERY


I mean, I get why he would buy the land his house was on, but why this place? And then pay the money to restore it?



RJ


(off mic)


I don’t know... but, I mean, if I had the money to buy a haunted asylum... I would absolutely do it.



AVERY


But, would you restore the buildings? Take care of the grounds?



RJ


(off mic)


Yes, of course.



AVERY


Hummm.



SFX: BOO Transition Sting.



SFX: We are basement level at the connecting point of all of the Institute’s tunnels. There is a slight electrical buzz that is almost soothing.



00:21:31


RJ


[BEEP] why don’t you tell us where we are right now?



CARETAKER


Right now, we are in the underground tunnel system that connects all the buildings here at the Mendenhall.



RJ


But what is this specific location?



CARETAKER


Ah, this is called the “cross roads.”



AVERY


It’s a real interesting shape.



CARETAKER


It’s where all the tunnels intersect.



RJ


There are 5 triangular pillars pointing out from the center of the room, and on either side is a tunnel that... crosses over its nearby tunnel... shooting off in different directions.



AVERY


Huh, ... it’s a big star.



RJ


Oh, yeah... if you looked down at it from above.



CARETAKER


And, uh, this was all here before the Mendenhall was built.



RJ


How do you mean?



CARETAKER


These tunnels were here for ages, so the Institute just designed the entire facility’s lay out around them. Gave the staff an easy way to get around.



00:22:28


AVERY


Huh. Was there another structure here they demo-ed before building?



CARETAKER


No, I think the site was clear, just the tunnels.



AVERY


Hum, that’s weird.



CARETAKER


This is the exact center of the 9 main buildings. The tunnels all meet here together... giving this juncture, uh, it’s 5 sided shape.



AVERY


There are 10 tunnels.



CARETAKER


Huh?



RJ


10 tunnels?



CARETAKER


Yeah, yeah.



AVERY


Buff, it smells like bad dirt... can dirt go bad?



RJ


And 10th connects to?



CARETAKER


Ah, it heads out to Great Cliff.



AVERY


Right.



SFX: BOO Transition Sting.



RJ


So, BOO Berries, we have motion sensors in each of the tunnels, body cams are on, EMF meter in hand and ghost box on deck. And we are going dark in 5...



CARETAKER


Going dark?



RJ


4...



AVERY


For the night vision camera.



RJ


3...



CARETAKER


Uh...



RJ


2...



AVERY


I don’t like it either.



RJ


One! LIGHTS OUT!



SFX: Electrical buzz drops out.



CARETAKER


Oh, Jesus Christ.



00:23:35


RJ


(to ghosts)


If there's anybody in the room right now can you give me a couple of knocks, or taps? Anybody here?



SFX: Distant rustling sound... possibly conversation.



AVERY


Is that voices?



RJ


What did you hear?



AVERY


It was like a... I don’t know, it was from down over there to the right?



CARETAKER


Mighta’ be like a bird or a rat.



AVERY


Rats? That’s awesome. We got bats up in here too?



CARETAKER


Oh yeah.



AVERY


Cool, cool, cool, cool, cool.



RJ


(to ghosts)


I'm really sorry that you’ were in pain here... and I'm asking you if it would be okay, if you could just talk to us for a little bit?



CARETAKER


That light over there, it turned on.



RJ


The motions sensor in the northern tunnel has fluttered on.



00:24:27


AVERY


Where does that tunnel lead too?



CARETAKER


Uhhhhhh.



RJ


Okay, so I'm now going to put the EMF meter on and this will pick up energy of anybody else here.



CARETAKER


How does that work?



RJ


They detect the fields released by moving electrically charged objects, so if there is a spike, here in the signal, that’s a change in electrical current, which indicates a spirit.



AVERY


But, in real life what’s that used for?



RJ


Locate harmful EMF radiation, from like appliances and stuff.



AVERY


So, ghosts or life threatening radiation. Great.



SFX: Distant sound... could be nothing.



RJ


Does anybody hear that noise?



AVERY


I didn’t hear anything?



RJ


(to ghosts)


Don’t be afraid, come and talk to us.


(to Avery)

Avery, are you experiencing any cold spots?


AVERY

No. It’s actually crazy warm down here, I have to take this off. [glove in mouth] Gimme a sec.


SFX: Avery removes gloves and jacket.


SFX: Distant “breathing.”


RJ

Wait, wait wait.


AVERY

What?


RJ

Shhhh... shh... What was that noise - did someone just breathe really loudly?


AVERY

No -


SFX: The “wind” howls...


RJ

Oh shit! What was that?


AVERY

Was that you? Are you screwing with me?


RJ

No, I’m not doing anything, are you?


AVERY

NO! Jesus Christ, I ain’t doing shit.


RJ

I'm going to turn on the BOO box right now, running at 300 channels per millisecond.


AVERY

The “BOO Box”?


RJ

A ghost box, spirit box... it randomly scans through FM and AM frequencies to pick up the spirits’ words in the white noise.

(to ghosts)

So, this is a tool that will help you communicate with us.


SFX: The spirt box goes on, it is loud and jarring, rapidly switching through frequencies.


CARETAKER

Good God!


00:25:57

AVERY

That is so LOUD!


RJ

I know right.


AVERY

Ohhh, I hate it.


RJ

(to ghosts)

Can you tell us who is in this tunnel with us right now, please? ... Do you like us being here? ... Can you tell me who you are please? ... We just want to communicate with you. We mean you no harm.


AVERY

Oh weird...[BEEP] would you mind waving your arms around right now?


CARETAKER

Yeah... uh...why am I waving?


AVERY

Huh. It looks like it’s snowing near you.


SFX: RJ lowers the volume on the spirit box and crosses to Avery.


RJ

Let me see... Oh wow... yeah those are orbs! Did you feel anything just now, because there are a lot of orbs floating around you in a spiral.


SFX: The caretaker screams and bolts down one of the halls, taking off upstairs.


RJ (CONT’D)

[BEEP]!


AVERY

RJ, will you turn that damn thing off.


SFX: RJ turns off the Spirit Box.


RJ

(calling after him)

We didn’t mean to scare you!


AVERY

(calling after him)

Please come back.


RJ

(calling after him)

It’s ok, it was just a few... orbs.


AVERY

We should go.


RJ

Oh, I’m sure he’s fine.


SFX: A loud echoey guttural throaty burst of sound belches from down the hallway that leads to the Palmer Funeral Home like a mummy from a crypt. It has vibrating hmmm that lingers.


AVERY

RJ? ... RJ?


SFX: A sound similar to heavy footstep approach.


AVERY (CONT’D)

NOPE! NOPE-NOPE-NOPE-NOPE-NOPE-NOPE-NOPE-NOPE.


SFX: They bolt, rattling equipment shaking on their straps as they run.


RJ

AVERY! Your jacket!


AVERY

There are other jackets!


SFX: The mics suddenly cut out.


MUSIC: [BOO THEME]


00:27:37

AVERY/NARRATOR

To find out what happened next, please check out RJ’s ghost hunting show BOO! on [BEEP] and follow BOO at [BEEP].


SFX: BOO Transition Sting.


MUSIC: [POD THEME]


SFX: Avery and RJ are recording narration in their Homestead room.


[RJ is chuckles.]


AVERY

You ready?


RJ

Yeah.


AVERY

Alright.


[RJ is chuckles.]


AVERY/NARRATOR

Okay. After an extremely exhausting day, we are finally back at the Homestead.


RJ/NARRATOR

Exhausting, but phenomenal! The Mendenhall Institute! I mean come on!


AVERY/NARRATOR

And last night, that stuff from Miss Loretta?


RJ/NARRATOR

I know. I am still shooketh’. And The Light? What the hell is that shit about?!


AVERY

Ah. We smell cult right?


RJ

Definitely.


AVERY/NARRATION

Oh. And her story about patient #349... Stanley had to have based “The Lady in the Bell” on that. Whether it’s just folklore or truth it definitely colored his work. Especially the first book.